And already I’ve been to Mickey D’s, Diane’s, Wally World AND the WW gas station ($2.01 per gallon, which I simply HAD to have, even though my tank was barely half-empty). Which, for me, all before 9 a.m. on a Saturday, is PRETTY darn good.

And it’s a beautiful fall day.

And I’ll be damned if they weren’t playing CHRISTMAS music at Wal-Fart. On Nov. 1. Which gives further credence to my realization, just a couple of days ago, that November and December are just one big holiday — with all the rush-rush and stress that goes along with it. NOT that I have anything against Christmas, of course, but wouldn’t it be nice to enjoy the (generally) great weather and mild temperatures between Oct. 31 and Dec. 25 without the feeling that somebody, somewhere, wants me to spend money?

And speaking of spending money: I am the perfect foil for fast-food promotions. I can’t go to Taco Hell or McDougall’s withOUT purchasing something to go with my “free” whatever. Perfect examples: To go with my free “steal a base, win a taco” taco — thanks to somebody on the Tampa Bay Rays or the eventual world champion Philadelphia Phillies stealing a base in the opening game of the World Series — I also bought a bean burrito and a medium Pepsi; to complement my free Monopoly breakfast sandwich today, I also got an egg McMuffin value meal with a large Coke, so I could give an eggMo (that’s how that particular sandwich used to be abbreviated on the receipt, I’ve been told) to Diane and we could split the hash brown. (Speaking of which: McD’s hash browns have been absolutely AWFUL lately. Greasy and weird, texture-wise. I say the franchise should go back to using whatever meat by-products it used to use so they taste “normal” again.)

And that’s all I’ve got for now.